Medical Distinction Between Guts and Balls

There is a medical distinction between Guts and Balls. We've all heard about people having Guts or Balls, but do you really know the difference between them?

In an effort to keep you informed, here are the definitions:

GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the Guts to ask: 'Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'

BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the butt and having the Balls to say: 'You're next, Chubby.'

I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions.

Medically speaking there is no difference in the outcome.
Both result in death

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College Basketball Coaches are Turning into Circus Clowns!

During television coverage of college basketball games basketball some coaches seem to turn into clowns. 

Albeit they do not have painted faces or floppy shoes, they sprint up and down the sidelines yelling and screaming trying to motivate their players as if they were in the second ring of the big top with their behinds on fire.

Basketball rules define a coaching box, yet coaches seldom remain in it, especially when they want to berate an official, or try to get the next call by pleading their case. Maybe they should get a big horn and sound it when they think they have been cheated, or maybe they could squirt water from a flower that they are wearing on their lapel to get the officials attention. You might consider a hand puppet for effect.

The biggest violators are Dwight Schrute’s evil twin Tom Crean of Indiana, Michigan State’s human koala bear Tom Izzo, UConn’s Kevin Ollie, the petulant little boy from Louisville Rick Pitino, and sadly the worst is Marquette’s bald as a baby Buzz Williams.

Gents, do your teaching and motivating at practice so you can and sit down and enjoy the game. Please sit down so we can enjoy the game.

Your pathetic insincere tantrums are getting old and worn out just like the sawdust on the circus tent’s floor.